December 29, 2007

Thick and Thin..

Lately, things have been tough and kickin' my ass. Here's a little letter I made for someone that's special to me:

Well, doesn't this bring back memories? I remember you'd message me most of the time when we first started talking. Haha, it was even before we started talking, after we kinda got reunited at my birthday party. Damn, that was along time ago, huh? Time really took it's toll and we both have changed so much since we first met each other at your church. Like you, I've never had such a relationship wit' one person that I can just reminisce about everything that's happened between the two of us. You know, I remember the first time it really hit me that I realized I was going to be so, so far away from you. It was about 10 days before I was going to leave for San Diego and that night, I was wit' you in Auntie Julie's kitchen. We were just talking and trying to keep the idea of me leaving out of our heads. I can still picture myself looking into my old cellphone and checking how much longer I had with you. My heart literally dropped and I felt how heavy it was when I realized short amount of time I had with you. That was probably one of the moments that I don't ever want to relive again. I remember tearing up so quickly that I couldn't even hold myself back. The pain of me knowing you and I wouldn't be able to see one another was the most hurt I've ever felt. Then when we were able to calm each other down, I told you to get a jacket because I wanted to take you somewhere special to me. Then, we walked outside the sidedoor and walked all the way to the park near your house and to the bench were I first proposed to you 2 1/4 years ago. It was special to me because it symbolized the beginning of a relationship I promised to make you the most happiest girl in the world, just like Junior Prom. That moment was so wonderful, too. We came from the movies and we went to that park and we were playing with my old cellphone; I got the courage to make an important decision that I thought so heavily about. I took you by your two hands, looked into your eyes wit' the moon reflecting in them, and asked you to be my girlfriend. Hun, I know it's been rough lately and I know I've given you such a hard time, but I hope you can understand that change is very difficult for me and that it's going to take some time for me to change. I just wanna ask you to keep patient wit' me like when I do when you're getting ready... jk. Just wanted to make it a little humerous, but anyways.. What I wanted to say is that although you may not see the love I have for, just remember that it's there and it's never gone anywhere. You're still the girl I go crazy for, the one that keeps me awake when I drive in the middle of night from San Diego to the Bay, the only woman I need to survive and motivate through difficult times. Baby, I love you and I miss you. I know you love reading these long messages and that you don't get tired of doing so, but I'm gonna cut it right here 'cause I kind of don't know what else to type. Just know that even though you don't hear me or see me, I'm always thinking of you and I know you are, too. I love you, darling. xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Reeve-Warren Anthony Carag Bantug